Sunday, April 5, 2009

slippery

Questions from the shower...

The other day, a friend mentioned some relatives that recently divorced.

"He cheated on her after 37 years of marriage." She said this with such disgust.

Why is it so bad? Or so much worse than if he had cheated on her after, say, 20 years of marriage? Or after just a year?

If the man had been faithful and true to his wife for 37 years, should he not get some credit for that? Does one indiscretion wipe out all of the self-control he has exhibited over the years?

However, had he cheated on her at their reception... in the first month... in the first year of marriage, I believe the same level of disgust would be held by many.

So, the question is, what is the bottom of the curve of disgust... or the higest point of acceptability? When is the sweet-spot for cheating on your wife? At what point would we say "well, it could have been worse, they could have been married for longer/shorter when he cheated."

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I missed a pill a couple months ago.

Were getting "fixed" not such horribly invasive and somewhat hazardous surgery, I would have had it done years ago. Instead, my religion is taking a few moments every day around 8:00 p.m. to take my pill. I live in terror of becoming pregnant. In fact, for a time in my early adolesence, I feared immaculate conception. Not rational, admittedly... but no one would ever claim I don't worry enough.

So when I realized my recent error, I immediately visited the pharmacy to get Plan B. I wanted to ensure if there was potential within me, it would not have a chance to inplant itself. And if it were to inplant, I would want to know within days that I needed to take further steps before the month was through.

I feel a strong responsiblity to snuff out such potential before it can become viable. It seems to me the longer you let something like that fester, the worse it is. The mere passage of time gives it more potential.

When children die in their youth, people mourn what could have been. "They had so much potential." For some reason shooting 15 year old seems far worse than a 19 year old.

What does the "potential" curve look like for a human being? From fertilization of egg, through trimesters, and birth through youth to adulthood? At what point is someone considered to have the most potential?

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